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#unmasking

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The hardest part about unmasking is developing the courage and resilience to act against the interest of another person (usually by upholding a personal boundary you've ignored so far) and to then strike the right balance in determining who deserves an explanation (because they actually want to listen) and who is a lost cause and just wants you to admit that you're wrong.

It's a really odd thing to go through when so far you've tried to please everyone. Who are you to put your judgement over the judgement of other people?

Since I was largely following social scripts that I had learned before I knew I was Autistic, and would say things like, “I’m fine” when I didn’t mean it, or that I liked someone’s artwork when I really didn’t think it was that good:

I assumed that everyone else was being completely fake at all times, especially when they said that they liked me or valued me in any way.

Highly highly recommend fellow high masking #Neurodivergent folks, if you can, to get alone time and just do what pops into your head (important: as long as nobody is getting hurt, including yourself) Be free to explore who you are without the world telling you to shut up. Talking, singing, moving, dancing, exploring, etc.

It may seem weird at first, because to society it is weird, but if you're alone there is nobody there to care except yourself.

It's time to be free of your personal shackles and just be happy.

Will you still have to deal with neurotypical society's shackles of unfun, of course, that's life, but you don't need to hide from yourself. Be your own safe space.

My new therapist is also autistic and they asked me to envision who I could be if if I shed 50+ years of masking and let myself be fully, authentically me. It’s so exciting…I simultaneously grin and tear up when I think about it. I think I’ve been waiting for permission without realizing it. I can’t wait to see who emerges from this. #AutisticJoy #Unmasking #AutisticUnmasking #UnmaskingAutism #ActuallyAutistic @actuallyautistic